AC/DC FIX!

Hell’s Bell’s, I finally get a chance to write about the best band ever! Now, I do recall writing a similar memory to this awhile back for JamsBio, but I wanted to be sure to set the mood for this dedication to AC/DC, the Rock God’s of the music industry!

You see, I was just a little tike, knee high to a grasshopper when AC/DC first entered the music scene, but I still remember my mom and pop spinning the vinyl’s all the time.

As I grew up, I grew more in tune with their music, or should I say their Rock N’ Roll bliss? I absolutely loved these guys, and those shorts? What about those shorts people?  Who else could pull off a look like that? Angus Young was indeed on the eccentric side of rockstar, but I am not sure who would be considered more talented than him, in my opinion of course.

AC/DC is just one of those bands, that make every girl in America woo, and make every guy in the world want to be the AC/DC “air guitar king”!  Well I was one of those American girl’s that woo’d, woo’d myself right into humiliation that is.

I believe the year was 2003, the place, definately Ellie’s Place in Torrance. Ellie’s Place was a friendly little dive bar that I bartended at. This place had Rock N’ Roll ambiance for sure. There was an old fashioned juke box that was home to every classic hard rock album known to man. Most of the biker’s that strolled in would want to play Lynard Skynard or Creedence Cleerwater, but not me, no sir! I wanted AC/DC and it had to be, “You Shook Me All Night Long”.

Well one night while I was cleaning up the bar and preparing to close, no one in sight, I put a quarter in the jukebox, grabbed my broom and danced like no other! Great, right? Wrong! What I didn’t know, was that there was an audience at the door. While I was “Shaking it all night long”, they were laughing all night long!

I’m not talking simple strutting around, humming. No, I am talking dirty dancing  with a broom! Now, this was definately before the time of YouTube, thank God, but it never got put to rest either. Word got out fast, somewhat like a wildfire, burning out of control, that the “bartender at Ellie’s” would dance for you if you put AC/DC on the jukebox.

Most people want to leave this earth being known for the famous things they have done or the legendary albums they have recorded, not I, I just wanted to leave this earth! The humiliation thatAC/DC has caused me, and I still want to put that darn song on, in jukeboxes everywhere I go.

Just when I thought they would just become another legendary band in rock history, or on VH1′s “Metal Mania”, they return and bigger than life itself, blacker than black beans, heavier than…Well you get the point! They are back in black!

These Australian Rock God’s are going to once again make young girls cry (well maybe old girls cry this time around) and dude’s everywhere tune up their air guitars, with their new return, the new album, drum roll please…Black Ice! This will be the band’s first release in over 8 years! Well JamsBio isn’t the only one that is ready to honor the God’s, I will be right there in the front row…right JamsBio?

Ah, I can already hear the thundering sound of metal’s finest tearing through the stadium and making me weak in the knees all over again, all night long

Married or……SINGLE???

My Life In a Nutshell

Should my husband decide to leave me, for someone better, younger, less crazy…I take great comfort in knowing that despite my advancing age, I’m still desirable in the eyes of  the opposite sex; namely, men who are in their late 50′s, early teens OR aren’t playing with a full deck.

My list of current suitors include:
1. Yankee Doodle Dog, the guy or girl, playing a dog profile on facebook. On Saturday, he/she gave me an opportunity for lunch…at In N’ Out Burgers.

 
2. Billy, the cart collector at Vons. Despite not being absolutely sure which state houses the Denver Broncos, he is a die-hard Bronco fan.  He also thought I needed a “Latte” before heading home to my miserable family.

3. Antonio, the butcher at the Italian deli. Reaching almost to my shoulder blades, Antonio is the tallest of my potential boyfriends and also the one most obsessed with my fertility. Using adjectives typically reserved for the animal products with which he works, I have overheard him describe me more than once as “good breeding stock” to his co-workers.  I know he has seen me scream obscenities at my two un-ruly boys , while in the meat department.

When I didn’t see Antonio for over 2 weeks, I thought that he had been fired.  I was about ready to look for a new beau when out of nowhere Antonio suddenly reappeared.

“You’ve probably been wondering where I’ve been,” Antonio said, as he sliced my turkey. I really didn’t want to know where Antonio spends his time outside the deli, but he felt compelled to tell me–and the long line of customers standing behind me–anyway.

“I was in jail,” he said, giggling. “Now I’m on house arrest. I’m allowed to go to work and that’s it.”  “Where were you at?” asked the man standing behind me. After comparing notes, the two men figured out that they had an incarcerated friend in common. Yeah, it only looks more promising to me!

Before handing me my bag of sliced turkey, Antonio told me that he had been arrested for a DUI. He described his arrest, his court date, and his jail term as if they were rides at an amusement park. He ended his tale with a flattering proposal. “If you want to go on a date with me,” he said with a knowing wink, “You’ll have to drive because my license is revoked…again!”

I turned down the invitation on the grounds that next to mass murderers, drunk drivers are my least favorite group of people.

When I returned home, I crossed Antonio’s name off my “Summer Fling” list.

“Down one already?” my husband observed with a wry smile.

I was in no mood for his mockery. After my husband left the room, I began mourning my loss.

A good man is hard to find.  Why is it, that men get more after 50 and women get less after 30?  Is this something that should be addressed?  I think so!

Its the 80′s, Ladies!

80′s…Aahh, the 80s! For many, this was the time of all those gorgeous and glamorous hair bands, others probably the time they were getting spanked by the birthing Doctor, either way, great times! I may be a writer, for better or worse, but my real passion is in the hands of music, glorious, spell-binding music!

 The thought of even writing a piece on 80′s hair bands, just gives me the chills, they are “chill-worthy”! I think I will start with Motley Crue, because after all, I knew them before they were Motley Crue. I pulled the plug, literally on them back in the 80′s. After sneaking  into the Troubadour in Hollywood at the precious age of 15, I made my way to fame by standing up in the front, by the stage, and during their 2ND set, tripped over the wires (line, in musical jargon). I believe that even if Nikki Sixx doesn’t remember me personally, he remembers the night, the night the lights went out in Hollywood!

 Here I go again, with Whitesnake, and that over-famous super ballad, “Here We Go Again”. I mean, who doesn’t want to be Tawny Kitaen? Then, history repeating itself with, “Is This Love”. “Here I Go Again” (a re-recording of a song on Saints & Sinners in 1982), was at #1 for what seemed an eternity. Other hit singles from the album were “Still of the Night” (#79) and “Give Me All Your Love” (#48 in 1988).

 I smell a Ratt, no, not really, I’m talking about the band Ratt. Prior to selling more than 16 million albums worldwide and establishing itself as one of the most popular groups of the 1980s, Ratt perfected its trademark mix of guitar heroics, anthemic hooks and hedonistic attitude playing the clubs along Los Angeles’ famed Sunset Strip, claims an official from the Ratt website.

According to their website, the band signed with Atlantic Records, releasing its debut in 1984. Out Of The Cellar, sold more than three million copies and rocketed into Billboard’s Top Ten on the strength of its first single, “Round And Round.” Peaking at #12 on Billboard’s Singles chart, the track was the first in a long line of hit songs and videos that made Ratt a fixture on the radio and MTV as well as a major live act playing to sold-out crowds across the nation. So as for 80′s bands, hats off to Ratt!

 Next in line to claim a bit of fame is, Poison. The band who declared that every rose has it’s thorn, they rule indeed! All I can say about them is, “What about that hair”? Every girl in America and beyond locked herself in the bathroom to do up the do! I don’t know about the roses, but the charts didn’t wither for quite some time!

I had always thought Cinderella was just a fairytale…well they are! A dreamy, steamy, fairytale! I refuse to be the fool, better yet, Nobody’s fool, so the song goes. This band may not have lived on the charts for very long, but they hung around on my wall forever…Rock On Cinderella…it aint midnight yet!

I was bitten more than once, but shy I was not. Great White was simply great! Everyone will know them from the popular tune, “Once Bitten Twice Shy”. This band rocked the ages, along with Def Leppard, Van Halen, Europe and Queensryche all through the 80′s! Don’t believe me, just check out all the videos on youtube!

Mama Mia: Pizza for the Obamas

A ridiculous look at having way too much money!

See more at http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1642132/mama_mia_pizza_for_the_obamas.html

Yo Ho, Yo NO!

up close and way too personal look at piracy.

See more at http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1640181/yo_ho_yo_no.html

Angels Fan Dies

Brian Powers, 27, dies after fight breaks out at Angels’ Stadium opening day.

See more at http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/1636619/angels_fan_dies.html

Yo Ho, Yo NO!

Did someone say pirates? As if our country isn’t in enough trouble, we now have pirates that look like, well not pirate’s! Just because my idea of a pirate resembles Jack Sparrow or Captain Hook in Peter Pan, doesn’t mean that these Somali pirates are no threat to the U.S. I am just thinking though, why has it been so difficult to over power these guys floating around in row boats with homemade weapons, when we have a much larger crew, like the Military? This is not the first hostage situation and it certainly will not be the last! What is wrong with us and our thinking? Why have we become such a kinder, gentler Country?

Dear Mr. President…oh nevermind. I am extremely curious to see what our next plan of action is because reading the papers, watching the news has me somewhat nervous. Piracy expert, Roger Middleton, of the London-based think tank Chatham House said the pirates were in “a very, very tight corner.” and “They’ve got only one guy, they’ve got nowhere to hide him, they’ve got no way to defend themselves effectively against the military who are on the way and they are hundreds of miles from Somalia,” he said. Okay, so this being said, we still have not taken over, gained control of the situation and brough back Capt. Richard Phillips safely to his family, why?

I am definitely not a Politics kind of gal, I am also not hip to the protocal of war and hostages, but lets be honest here, these guys wearing t-shirts around their heads from Africa, are what we are afraid of? We have made robots that can think, seek and destroy, but we cannot take over a row boat full of so-called African pirates! Shame on us!

Phillips has a radio with him and contacted the Navy and the crew of the Alabama to say he is unharmed, the Maersk shipping company said in a statement, adding that the lifeboat is within sight of the USS Bainbridge, the naval destroyer that arrived on the scene earlier Thursday…well then, lets get busy folks! Someone needs to pick up that red phone and give President Obama a friendly nod, letting him know it is ok to GO IN!

Steve Romano, a retired head of the FBI hostage negotiation team, said he doesn’t recall the FBI ever negotiating with pirates before…really? Maybe that is because it is impossible to “negotiate” with a criminal, but I guess we have not thought of that. He continued with, this situation is similar to other standoffs and the difficulty will be negotiating with people who clearly have no way out, he said. I hate to be so negative, but, no way out? Then why do they still have one of our own, this is not a game and they are not going to give us a hug when it’s all over…they will be back for the next ship. These “pirates” are not that of Jack Sparrow or Captain Hook, trying to claim a big powerful ship and staking their claim to some deserted island somewhere, they are toying with us, showing us that they can. Stealing goods is just a perk.

Our Country is in desperate need of change, no lie there, but at what cost? I suppose we could say lets just pick our battles, but are we not a strong Country? Are we not perfectly capable of shutting down terrorists in their tracks? I don’t think we are giving ourselves enough credit. We are fortunate to have a President now who is in agreement with the idea of change, this is a turning point for us and in my opinion, the longer we wait, the closer we will be to looking like President’s past, years past.

Plan of action…there are risks to this plan, as with any sensitive situation like this, but I believe it to be better than sitting around picking our noses. If we step in with force, play them at their own game, there is a chance that they could become angered and harm Capt. Phillips, but there also are risks in our paying a ransom. Last time the Maersk Alabama crew gave the pirates what they wanted, the crew got nothing in return. That was now, when the pirates made off with Phillips.

Beyond that, by now, these pirates are getting tired and hungry, and they’re less likely to be hanging on to the resolve it takes to kill someone in the full knowledge they then would be killed. In the first few days, they were not as hungry as they must be now. It appears they have several weeks’ supply of food. However, even on full stomachs, they probably are growing panicky. I say, pull back from the lifeboat that’s carrying the pirates and Capt. Phillips. Stop talking with the pirates, look how well that has been going, and Give them a little more time for hunger, thirst and paranoia to set in. Meanwhile, fly to Mogadishu with our own “pirate” demands. If we are going to be wasting time, doing this slowly, then take advantage of the time.

Our demands, you ask? We leaflet the Haradheere neighborhoods where these thugs and their families live and come armed with a laundry list of our own demands, money for each pirate we release. Our Country is in such an economic crisis, what do we have to lose from gaining a couple Million? The threat, you ask? The pirate’s do this or they never return home, period.

“Pirate sources”, whatever that is…maybe the parrots, say that the pirates want a $2 million ransom before they release Capt. Phillips…okay, well we want 3 million for the release of their pirates and the safe return of Captain Phillip’s…why not? What is there, like five of them? I may be living in fantasy land with this thought, but after all the news clippings I have read and all the “laid back” attitude our Government has been taking, I am deeply concerned at our Country. Just the other day, a dude steals a plane and has our fighter jets chase him around through three U.S. States, brilliant! Time to get nasty folks, time to get er done!

 

Mother’s Day Everyday

The title sounds awesome right? Well read on my friends! I actually started this on line “column” in an attempt to land a writing gig with DB, notice i am still here? So I was talking with a good friend the other day and she reminded me that I wear many hats…was that her way of saying, “damn girl, you have had a lot of jobs”? Or was she simply stating the truth…I have had a lot of jobs! Either way, I decided to write a piece about motherhood, the glorious, appreciated job of motherhood, because no matter how many jobs I have had at the end of the year, I am still happily employed at home.

If you are a mom, grab your coffee, stick your kid in front of the television and enjoy. If you are a woman thinking about having children continue reading and if you are a man, I must warn you there is graphic subject matter in this article that will be sure to have you running for the nearest exit! If you are my children, I apologize.

Just like the question, “Which came first, the chicken or the egg?”, I will start with childbirth and move forward from there. Childbirth classes are brilliant! I personally tried two different types, Lamaze and The Bradley method. The one I enjoyed the most, “Bradley Method” as it was more realistic in teaching you to breathe normal and relax during pain. I was able to focus on my task ahead rather than how I was feeling physically. I wish I would have taken anger management too, along with the childbirth classes. My husband and every nurse in there would have appreciated that!

Birthing classes not only teach labor and delivery but also care for your new bundle of joy. I know what you are thinking; being a mother comes naturally… Oh OK. I am guessing that you have never really sat down and tried one of those breast pumps then, have you? I will never forget the first time I hooked one of those contraptions up to my breast; I looked like a cat that had just stepped on tape! Running around begging for help to get it off, as if my life depended on it. How about when the umbilical cord finally comes all the way off…at home! No one told me that would happen, and imagine my horror when I was changing my son, and all of a sudden this shriveled up black thing lands in my hand, what the hell was that? I had no idea that was going to happen, not at all. Speaking of black things, did you know that a newborn has to get “regular” before diaper changing? Well he or she does and believe me, it will have you wondering if your poor child just ate tar!

These are just a few of the joys you will face, and it so much more pleasant when you know to expect them. Parenting does not come with a “manual” or a “sanity back guarantee” It just happens, and the more prepared you are, the better the experience. I truly believe that if someone told me how little I would be sleeping once the baby arrived, I would have spent the last nine months doing just that! You will have plenty of time to send Thank You cards or do the dishes, usually around 3am, 4am and 6am.

If it had not been for my childbirth classes, I would have really thought that 10 centimeters really did look like the diagram at my Doctor’s office; someone should have told my Doctor that he should update his displays to show a watermelon pushing through that small round 10 centimeter model. There is another bit of advice I should give, caster oil. Thanks to my wonderful grandmother, or was it my ex best friend? I can’t really remember, but they said it would induce labor…it did, long hard hours of heaving over the toilet, the only contractions were those in my throat.

The best thing I ever learned though, was to keep the diaper semi closed while changing, because despite what you may have heard, baby boy’s can aim! And they also know how to smile very at a very young age. Baby girls, just because I have not mentioned baby girls does not mean they are any sweeter! That cute little nursery rhyme lies, you know the one, “Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice”, who wrote that anyway? I have two girls, they were just as curious as my boys, if not more so. The time that my oldest (3 at the time) decided that flour (not flower) was a blast to play with in the kitchen. I only found this out by walking unexpectedly into my kitchen wearing slippers and flying across the kitchen floor, leaving a trail of white powdery smoke behind me…guess who was sitting there laughing her butt off? Yes, my daughter Lauren!

Amy, my younger daughter. I believe she was taught everything she knows from her older sister. She found it rather exciting to rip off her diaper in grocery stores…every visit! Normally she would do this once we got to the checkout stand, but on occasion, would attempt it as soon as we arrived, I soon realized that “onsies” were not the cool new fashion statement and “pull ups” were extremely dangerous in public. Then there was the produce section, her obsession with apples became disastrous. Throwing apples as others would fall from the beautifully designed apple display, she had a pretty good arm.

Friends With Benefits…Friends, we all have them, we all love them, and we sometimes hate them…but what about not seeing them? I am talking about the invisible friend. Anyone who has children, knows exactly what I am talking about. They are the friends that live in your head, predominantly in a head of a 4 year old!

These friends come with benefits, just ask any child. They are always with you, always like you, they are never mean or cruel to you and they always take the blame for you. More importantly, they take the blame for broken things! I happen to collect fairies, and for awhile I was starting to think they really did exist! There was no other explanation for all my cherished belongings to keep getting destroyed. Fairies do that sort of thing you know…just ask my Daughter! It all went down like this…

“Craaash!”

“Amy, what did you do? You know that vase was my favorite!”

“Mom, I didn’t't do that, really it just broke.”

“Amy, things do not just break, they are broken by people, maybe accidents, but not all on their own.”

“Pixie did it.”

“Who’s Pixie?”

“You know, the little Fairy who hangs around here. She wanted a flower.”

“Oh really.”

“Yeah.”

“Then who took her out of the china cabinet?”

“Pixie did that, too. But we helped her. You know what, Mom?”

“What?”

“She said she thought the flowers were pretty…like you, so we had to help her.”
“You know what else, Mom?”

“What?”

“Pixie said not to tell you, but she is very sorry though.”

“That is enough Amy! And who is we?” “You said we had to help her, so who is we?”

“Me and Lauren, silly”

“Oh…So where is Lauren?”

“In da closet”

“Why is she in the closet Amy?”

“She said we were playing hide and seek, and she wanted to hide, I’m gonna seek”

“I see, so were you looking for her in the china cabinet?”

“Oh no silly, she would not fit in there, but Pixie does!”

This amusing conversation was one I held with my daughter when she was the precious age of 4. Lauren was her 6 year old sister. See I have four children now, ages 21, 19, 13 and 10. They all have nicknames too. My two boys are “Double and Trouble”. My two sweet girls are known as “Seek and Destroy” Lauren seeks and Amy destroys. This has been the routine for the majority of their lives.

Usually, pre imaginary friend days anyway, Lauren would break something and Amy would get blamed, that was until Amy discovered the benefits of “invisible friends”! I think in some book somewhere this is referred to as “down the food chain”. Lauren blamed the younger one and now the younger one can blame the imaginary friend, once the boys came along, Amy had it made! Boys were just given the blame by rights and rank.

The vase incident (Case # 787,000), was just one of those incidents that made me question why did I ever have children? The vase, an antique vase from my grandmother, was beautifully housed in my china cabinet along with all my other collectibles that were slowly ending up in a trash can grave. The Fairy, who Amy apparently named Pixie, was one of my collectibles in the cabinet.

I heard the crash, then I heard pitter-patter of feet running down the hallway, then a door slammed and shortly after that, I heard voices whispering, “Eeeew, you are in trouble!”, “uh uh…you are, I’m gonna tell!” Then IT happened, the plan to blame the “friend”. It was like a puzzle piece all fitting together now. The girls had always seemed to have a name for someone, when something went wrong, I just didn’t't realize that all my fairies were starting to come alive. Instead I was trying to determine which of the friends was no longer allowed in my home!

I should have suspected something. It was just plain fishy. I had usually always been on my guard with those two; I should have smelled trouble brewing from afar. Good parents know the rules: Quiet can only mean one of three things; the children are either asleep, spending the night at a friends or destroying something valuable.

Apparently in this case it was destroying something valuable. Evidence of broken valuables was everywhere! trinkets were spread all over, some lying on their sides, some down on the floor and tiny particles of glass that resembled, “The Vase” splattered all over nearby furniture. It looked like a re-enactment of the civil war between trolls, fairies and crystal valuables!

Naturally, the villains denied all involvement, Enter the scapegoat: Pixie, the fairy. As I pulled her from the shattered wreckage, Seek and Destroy were quick to lay blame, stumbling over each other to explain what the fairy had been doing all along. Like any good parent, I set out fair and reasonable punishment to the true culprits, and explained that the china cabinet was off-limits-even if the fairies asked them to take them out. I am considering writing a book one day, with four kids (2 girls, 2 boys), I am positive it would be a best seller. Between ER visits monthly, random acts of craziness and my panic attacks induced by small children, a book is long over due.

My children are grown for the most part, but still know how to drive me insane! With every memory I have of motherhood past, a new one comes along and I can only imagine what my memories will be once I am a grandmother…to be continued.

Thought For the Day

I have never really been into war movies or even documentaries, but one sticks out in my mind and after seeing pieces of it today, I was reminded of an eye opening experience that I had last week.

The documentary is a classic that I think everyone should see at least once, Band of Brothers, written by Stephen Ambrose detailing the experiences of E Company, (of the 506th Parachute Infantry Regiment, United States Army 101st Airborne Division) from their basic training (at Toccoa, Georgia) through the American Airborne landings in Normandy, Operation Market Garden, The Battle of Bastogne and on to the end of the War.

 What I found so intriguing about this series, was not its depiction of the events of ‘history, or its re-depiction if you will but instead, its attempt to portray the sheer breadth of human experience, emotional and physical, that war elicits from a human being.  

I work very late hours and have made it my usual routine to stop for a midnight snack at jack in the box after getting off of work, shame on me I know… so everytime I pull into the drive through, there sits or should I say sleeps, a man in tattered clothing, unshaven with eyes that could pierce you with pain.  This old man talks to himself and on occassion to me, nothing he says makes too much sense really, but somewhere in his own head he does.

I feel almost ill to even admit this, but for the longest time, I shunned him, ignored his attempts to solicit a dollar or something off of the dollar menu, like coffee.  I assumed that he was a drunk, a derelict of our poverty strickened corner in San Pedro.  I had no time for this old man in my life.

Some nights I would pull up and while waiting in the long line, I could actually see his chest moving up and down under the dirty blanket as he slept.  My mind would start to wander a bit and i would think what it would be like to be homeless, cold and hungry.  I wondered if he was ever scared or what was it like to wake up to singing birds and a new day after a night of sirens and buzzing street lamps…then the thought would pass, just like every other time.

It wasn’t until last week, that I actually talked to this man, primarily because i could not get my window up quick enough before he approached, so as I searched for an extra quarter to hand him in hopes to steer him in another direction, he spoke and this time, it was not jibberish talk.  He asked if I had family in the Military, he asked if I knew anyone who had been in the war…I said indeed I did and asked him why.  The old man just politely said thanks for the quarter but to put it away in a piggy bank until I had enough money to stop the war. He told me to go home and hug a soldier, that he would love just a cup of coffee instead and a simple thank you for the time he fought in the war.  

 Everyday I wonder about the things he has seen and the silence in his eyes. I thank him quietly everyday for who he is and what he has done; for he is a war veteran. He spoke to me once, but left an eternal mark when he  told me about his service as he struggled with his emotions and in the recounting of details that appeared to be still too painful to relay – after all this time! He was never able to marry it seems and is still a bachelor at 80 years old.

So yes, the next time you see a “drunk” maybe he just wants a thank you.  With the economy the way that it is, I can’t help but think, homelessness could very well be a reality for many of us and I would hate to be the one sleeping at Jack in the Box trying to reassure people that I used to really be a normal woman with a normal house and normal life and that society has put me on this corner.

Rants & Raves part 1

“House”  I read somewhere last week that something big was about to happen on the show, exact words were,” It looks like someone on the show either dies or something else really horrible happens and I don’t expect it to be a fake-out, considering two years ago House fired most of his staff”.  Man, are they psychic or what?

Someone did die and it was Kutner! What? This only left my hubby thinking that he wasn’t really dead, it had to of been something not so simple…well it wasn’t, he’s dead! Now the question will be if next week they determine it to be an actual suicide or murder…interesting.  House is saving face once again, you know it was getting a bit drab for awhile…kudos to new writers! 

 ”American Idol”  I feel as though I just came back from a terrible funeral! I watched this silly show season after season, from day one! Now I actually give the remote to the hubby to watch football! Yeah, football!  I thought it would be a refreshing twist adding a 4th judge, especially a woman…Paula is just losing her charm.  I was wrong, there is no twist…it just stinks now! 

Paula seems to be drunk every episode, Simon continues on with the mean guy approach, Randy, well if i hear, “yeah dawg” one more time I might just puke! Then we have the lovely Kara (that is her name right?), what is wrong with Kara? Drugs, I’m suspecting.  She just gets all deep and into her feelings, like, “yeah man, it was there, it was just moving”…ugh! Bye bye American Idol.

How To Become A Movie Extra

Light’s, Camera & Action!

Becoming a movie extra can be a rewarding, fun and exciting opportunity. As with anything in life, there are chances of frustration and disappointment that go along with becoming an “extra” for television, movie and theater.

It is always best to keep an open mind, when pursuing this type of work and for some, career. Understand that just as you are eager to land that perfect spot, so are a thousand more. Being competitive helps but is not the only quality one must hold. You need persistence and a strong will to succeed.

There are many “agencies” that will be happy to take your money, take your sanity and take your dignity, all in the name of show biz. These entities need to be avoided at all costs! You should never have to “pay” for your talent. This does not mean that every Producer or Manager or even acting school out there is corrupt if they charge, they like us, need to earn a living too. It does mean to research everyone that you consider doing business with.

A few starter tips to get you on the industry road:

1. Create a portfolio with several high quality head-shots. If you have a family member or friend who is fantastic at capturing beauty in photos, use them! Start with at least two natural images (no touch ups). Include a minimum of 4 four more shots such as; 1 swimsuit, 1 formal wear and 2 casual wear (jeans, shorts, T’s).

2. Make a website! Even free websites work wonderfully to house all your images, Bio’s and past or recent work. Keep it easy to navigate, fun to read and simple to get to (no pop ups all over the place). One example of a free website is:

http://www.freewebs.com/

3. Stay focused and learn to take every “NO” as a “MAYBE”. This means that when the door closes, wait awhile and try again. Becoming discouraged and resentful at the film makers and casting agencies is not only unbecoming…it is a deal breaker. Just because you were not “right” for the first character, does not necessarily mean you are not right for the second and so on.